NAZMIN PIRBHAI – literally, it is so simple and easy: my name is Nazmin Pirbhai. You’re all probably wondering why I am ranting about this (if you’re actually reading this…) but honestly I am starting to get so annoyed. I work in admin and as such, I send and receive hundreds of emails per day – I have been working here since January, but I am starting to lose my cool with people’s attitudes. Okay attitude may be a strong term to use – maybe attention to detail works better…
I have a lovely signature set up with all my emails, which clearly states my name as Nazmin Pirbhai (the font size is 20 and the name is in bold), followed by my job role and contact details. This signature literally automatically gets included at the bottom of every email that I send out. So why are people still getting my name wrong? Some people reply back to my email saying ‘Hi Pirbhai’ – like really? Can you really not see that the Pirbhai is followed by Nazmin so obviously Nazmin is my first name? Others really get on my nerves when they reply back saying ‘Hi Nazim’ – I find this even more annoying than being called Pirbhai.
You may be thinking ‘Wow, she’s petty’ but I cannot stress over how much this annoys me. For me, my name is my identity and I don’t like people getting it wrong or shortening it for no reason – for example when random people choose to call me Naz. Like no, just NO. I don’t know you personally or that well, and neither have you asked my permission, so don’t go shortening my name please. Before I landed this permanent job, I did various temporary jobs – on my first day, my new colleagues would ask my name and look all confused and then say ‘Can we call you Naz instead?’. Don’t get me wrong, shortening names isn’t such a big issue to me and I never used to really mind but then I got thinking. Honestly, Nazmin in whole is not actually that hard to pronounce now then is it? Its only two syllables I mean if you can say Naz, why are you struggling with the Min?
Anyway, back to being called Nazim or Pirbhai – the reason why I absolutely hate being called Nazim is because it is actually a boy’s name. So I am sure you can understand why I find it so damn frustrating. In school, literally every time the class moved up to the next year and we had a new teacher for the new academic year and on the first day of first term they would call out the register, guess whose name used to get pronounced wrong? MINE obviously! Every teacher (including supply teachers) would initially read by name as Nazim (how??) and then I would correct them, and the entire class would laugh – everyone found it incredibly funny that I was miscalled by a boy’s name – yeah, ‘hilarious’. And I had to deal with this torture EVERY YEAR (sometimes even more than that when we had the misfortune of a supply teacher covering) for like TEN years of primary and secondary school – things only got better in college and uni, when I guess the staff were actually taught to read properly.
The same issue goes for Pirbhai – I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before (I’m pretty sure I have!) but I am not extremely fond of my last name. in fact, I hate it to a certain degree if I’m honest. I wish I had a much more generic or ‘normal’ last name. So now let me narrate to you all (who are still tuned in) another very unfortunate story in my life. What else did Nazmin used to get teased for for TEN years (yes, I do need to emphasise on the ten brutal years) besides Nazim? Of course, it has to be in regards to her last name, which everyone decided would be much better as PIRI PIRI CHICKEN. Yes you read that absolutely right – poor young little Nazmin would either be called Nazim or Piri Piri chicken! I mean, just imagine. And this is why I say kids are cruel. I ended spending pretty much every morning praying ‘ Please don’t let today be Pick-On-Nazmin day’ – not the kind of stress a kid needs to go through.
So yeah, I’m sure you can now appreciate my frustration. The teasing still scars me here and there, and so when somebody calls me either Nazim or Pirbhai, it brings back all of those horrible memories that I keep trying to push right behind the back of my mind. So please colleagues, DO NOT DO THIS TO ME. It will probably take you about TWO SECONDS to read my name properly on my signature. Or if you’re too lazy to do that, don’t address me by my name at all, just start off with ‘Hi’ – I will find that less offensive.